What’s happening for Pride Month here in Chiapas? Not much, really. Coming from Bellingham, a college town swelling with LGBT pride, Chiapas is a stark contrast. The culture is quite conservative here. In fact, “gay” is considered a vulgar term to even use. Gay people here instead refer to themselves as homosexuals, which would be offensive in the US. (Just in case you needed the reminder that what is offensive to you is not universal.)
It also seems that the terms used for it are much less about identity and much more about action here. In the US, I say that I’m gay, because, well, I am. I’m exclusively attracted to other men. But here in Chiapas, if I were to say that, it wouldn’t make any sense, because I am not “actively gay”, as some might call it. In fact, I’m marrying a woman in just under two months now. (I will go into an explanation for that if you guys ask me to, but it’s not the aim of this post, and it’s a semi-long story.)
There are some parts of Mexico that are normalizing LGBT representation. In particular, Mexico City. (Very liberal and very open.) Chiapas, however, is still firmly against it. My biggest hesitation in considering myself part of the church I go to is the way the pastor talks about it. He has disdain in his voice whenever he brings it up. I can’t consider myself a member of that church because I don’t even feel that I can open up about my past.
And that’s where we get at the problem. That is why so many LGBT people are lonely and isolated, and why so many grow up in the Church but walk away from it. In so many cases, we can’t talk about our struggles. I didn’t tell anyone I was gay until I was 24, and even then I was dancing around the subject. It wasn’t until two years of slowly opening up that I finally started using the term “gay”. I thank God that I found a group that would love me through that process instead of judging me.
Many like me never feel they can open up to the Church. So they go somewhere else they feel that they can open up. And this is how the LGBT community is formed. It has loads of problems, but for them, it is the only safe place. It’s the only group that allows them to be honest with themselves and with others. We as the Church desperately need to wake up to that fact. LGBT people are walking away from Christ because we’ve made them feel like they have to.
This is a lot of what my book series, starting with Without a Spark, is about. I want to use my writing to highlight the people that the Church has forced into hiding. And I hope that, while I’m here in conservative Chiapas, I meet one or two people that I can tell they don’t need to hide anymore.
We as the Church are supposed to be known for our love. Let’s live up to it. Let’s follow Jesus’ example and spend time with the “sinners and tax collectors”, the people society has cast out.